The not so Ole days but funny none the less!
THE CHAMPION'S PORSCHE
contributed anonymously...This story isn't from the old days but boy is it funny!
This is a story of the life of a Porsche that belongs to the Nextel championship winner of 2004 Kurt Busch! I am shiny silver Porsche that is very proud because I am very fast and a limited edition model GT2. I have all wheel drive and a power plant that produces almost 500 very proud ponies. I am designed to be driven like a racecar…. Well I am a racecar because in stock form I am factory lightened, don’t have A/C, or a radio from the factory!
I ring in at an amazing steal at over $200,000.00.
I was so excited because I found out that my new master was going to be the legendary NASCAR driver Kurt Busch! I knew that I was special because everybody at the dealership handled me like I was fragile as egg shells! I wanted to show those dealership guys that I tough as nails and as fast as the wind! I was capable of speeds around 200 MPH! It seemed like I was going to become somebody’s garage queen until I found out Kurt Bush Was going to be my new master! Now I knew that with Kurt behind the wheel I was going to be freed into the wind and be the object of everybody’s desire as I would surely blow by those suckers at least 150+ MPH so I was excited!
The day came Mr. Nextel Championship came to pick me up! I knew that I was special because everybody at the dealership made such a fuss over making me look like I had rolled around in the dirt the way they pulled me out of the showroom and backed me off the shiny checkerboard floor and sent me to the place where they make you all pretty by washing me, scrubbing me softly and making me all shiny! I knew today was special!
I was pulled back around the front of the building where there standing all proud and with an evil smile on his face was my new master! He was handed the keys and he fired me up! I could tell that the way he was talking about me I was going to be special to him.
I overheard him say “I don’t have to buy cars because Ford will give me whatever I want but I want this GT2! This car is a racecar in sheep’s clothing!”
Now here is where the fun begins! We pull out on the highway and Kurt was adjusting everything to suit him. Taking it easy on the car while still in Charlotte. I was a little disappointed because be this Nextel Championship Driver he sure was taking it easy on me! Man was I in for a surprise! Kurt got me out on the backwoods country roads and I assumed he was auditioning me for the part of being his special play toy! I just knew that I was going to really have to perform If I was to become an object of his desire so I am going to give him my everything and show him that I am a monster! My only fear was that he would get a ticket and I would never make it into the great stables of Kurt Busch!
Everything becomes a blur to blackness….
I sure hope Kurt loved my performance because he ended picking me up in an enclosed trailer to carry me home! I would finally be the play toy of KURT! Wait why are you taking me in an enclosed trailer so nobody can see me! I have only been with my master for 2 Hours! Why are you taking me to this shop! This can not be home!
OH MY GOSH!!!!! I HAVE BEEN WRECKED!!!!! I HAVE BEEN WRAPPED AROUND A TREE AND 3 OUT OF 4 CORNERS HAVE BEEN SMASHED IN!!!!! THE DRIVERS DOOR HAS BEEN MOVED IN ABOUT A FOOT!!!!! Did I try too hard because I was surely not too much for the NEXTEL CHAMPION KURT BUSCH!!! I was purchased, repaired and hope nobody ever finds out that I was too much power for Kurt to handle! I am still in the ownership of Kurt today….and hope the wrong person never finds out about the story of the day Kurt picked me up at the dealership!